Be Thankful

Song Spinning Now: Tears For Fears - Woman In Chains

I believe that in life, whatever "shitty" things that happen to us can be precious gifts for us to grow and develop into a better person. Instead of becoming a victims of others or victims of situations, which most people are experts at, we can graciously embrace all these "shitty" things into us life and see them as life lessons or learning experiences. (This can also be a humble or vulnerable experience, and it takes courage to acknowledge that we are all vulnerable.)

Life is never meant to be smooth sailing anyway, each of us has own issues and challenges to overcome physically, emotionally and spirtually. A rich man can be extremely lonely deep inside and is something he needs to work on or a pretty lady might be struggling with several relationship problems and she needs to work on this aspect. There is no need to be envious of others, its just that all of us have our own unique strengths and weaknesses in different ways. Envying others is beating yourself up the wall, as we will only view ourselves more negatively.

Despite the disappointment, failures, sadness and frustrations that I had, I am thankful to be alive and for everyday that I have. It is because of the cocktail of good and bad experiences that I felt I've truly lived. The 'shitty" things will happen to us whether we like it or not and that's a fact of life. The lesson here is really how to handle and integrate them into our life for the better. It is not easy for sure, but if you succeed, there is only freedom and control thats never been experienced before.

BE THANKFUL

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire,

If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don't know something.

For it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.

During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations.

Because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge.

Because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes.

They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary.

Because it means you've made a difference.

It is easy to be thankful for the good things.

A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are

also thankful for the setbacks.

GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.

Find a way to be thankful for your troubles

and they can become your blessings.

~ Author Unknown ~

The Finer and Finest Things in Life ~ by Chris Widener

In America, we have a saying: The finer things in life. These are the things that most people talk about when they are speaking of thing of high quality. In fact, much of that which propels people to pursue success, particularly financial success, is the desire to participate in the finer things in life.

Let's face it, increased finances enable us to do more things and enjoy things that we otherwise would not be able to afford. And we should consider that a blessing. I am at a stage where my wife and I, and our kids, can enjoy some of the finer things in life.

It hasn't always been that way. I think sometimes it is best to have to go years of getting by so that we appreciate more fully the finer things in life when we are able to experience them. I am thankful for where I am. Who can argue of the beauty of a fine painting? Who doesn't love the smell and feel of leather furniture? Who doesn't enjoy driving a well-engineered car? Who doesn't dream of the softness and warmth of a Cashmere sweater? Who doesn't like a nice watch that can be passed on to your son or daughter someday? All of these are common symbols of the finer things in life, and indeed they are.

There is only one possible pitfall that I have found in the pursuit of the finer things in life. It is common that many fall into this trap. It is this:While pursuing the finer things in life, we often become so engrained, so focused in the pursuit, that we do not experience the finest things in life.

You see, for the most part, the finer things in life, as commonly defined, cost money. And usually it takes a lot of time working to make the kind of money that enables us to experience the finer things in life. And in the pursuit of the money to enjoy the finer things in life, we are spending so much time that we are missing regular opportunities to enjoy the finest things in life.Let me tell you of a recent experience.

A couple of weeks ago I took my son, age 9, down to see some spring training baseball in Phoenix, Arizona. This was our second trip down together and we hope to make it an annual tradition. We popped down just for three days to see three games (Boy the Seattle Mariners are looking good this year! But I digress...) The first game we saw was against the California Angels in their spring training facility in Tempe.

There we sat waiting for the game to start. Now let me assure you, this was not an experience of the finer things in life. It was actually a little chilly out, though the sun was shining. We were sitting on relatively hard seats, and my cuisine consisted of peanuts and a diet-Pepsi. Hmmmmm.But do you know what I found myself thinking? "There is no place else in the world I would rather be right now."I was spending time with my boy, doing something we would both enjoy, and creating memories that will never go away.

This, my friends, was one of the finest things in life.What are the finest things of life in my book? Here are a few. You can see where I am going and name a few yourself. Reading a novel just for the fun of it. A casual stroll along the beach with nowhere to go. An extra half-hour at the coffee shop, catching up with friends and actually tasting the great flavor of a cup of coffee, rather than rushing it. A game of crazy eights with my kids. A quiet evening out with my wife.A Saturday afternoon sleeping on the couch in front of the fire. And the list goes on...Are you taking enough time to stop and taste of the finest things in life? Or are you so bent on getting to a point wherein you can experience the finer things in life?

I have a saying that "good is the enemy of the best." Sometimes the finer things of life get in the way of the finest things in life. Sometimes we settle for the finer things in life when we could be enjoying the finest things in life.

Visa has a series of advertisements out right now. They would go something like this (describing a vacation): Airline tickets: $1500. Hotel room: $1200. The smile on her face: Priceless. We can always put a value on the finer things in life, and I would encourage you to enjoy them if you can. But the finest things in life are priceless. You can put no value or price tag on them. It is a mandate that we take the time to enjoy them.Take some time this week to live up to the old saying: Stop and smell the roses. You will never regret it.

Chris Widener is an internationally recognized speaker, author and radio host. He is the author of five books and audio series as well as over 350 success articles.

My confession

Song spinning now: 'Papillon' by Secret Garden


Have you ever see someone in need and you know you should go up to help, but you are not fast to act on it and adopt a wait-and-see attitude instead?

I was walking towards bus 139 stand in Toa Payoh Interchange when I saw two 'uncles' walking towards my direction and were talking in a manner that sound like shouting. As I was walking fast, I didn't bother to take a good look at them. As I stood at the 139 stand, I turned around and saw the two men had already walked to a nearer distance. Suddenly, it became clear to me what they are 'shouting' about.

I realised these 2 men are actually blind and they had been shouting 'Excuse me, may I know where is bus number 231?' repeatedly. Both were carrying their sticks and holding on to each other's arm as they walked on. The sad thing was that those people who walked past can't even be bothered to stop and help them. Many just passed by, pretending not to see and some even tried to avoid them by diverting their routes. There were about 6 people who passed by and none of them did anything to help.

In fact, I was no better than the 6 because from the moment I was aware of their situation, I didn't go up to offer help immediately. I was looking at them from where I stood, which was a short distance away from them, and silently hoping that one of these people who walked pass them will extend their help. In my mind I was also debating whether I should just go up and help without further delay. As I still debating, there was this man who stepped out of nowhere, walked up without any hesitation and lead them to bus 231 stand.

Conscience started to eat me away when I realise I didn't do anything to help when I knew someone needed it badly, I felt like a loser for my inaction. I don't know why I was acting so passively that day, I did have the intention to help but somehow I just didn't do it. What was wrong with me? Did I even have a heart? Was it beacause of the bad day I had that made me so unresponsive?

I know this should not be an excuse. I was a good example of someone with no action, but rather sitting around, thinking and waiting for it to happen. The consequence is that I'll be carrying that guilt with me, whereas the man who went up to help get to receive the pure joy for helping someone in need.

I guess in times of our life, we tend to encounter such situations that really put our character and soul to the test. It is the concious decision we make and the effort we take that will really set us apart from the rest. When other people choose not to do it, you go for it instead. Anyway, what's the risk of helping someone? There's really none..

I acknowledge my selfishness this time, but I'll make sure there will not be a next time. Here's a promise I made to myself. The next time I encounter a smilar situation, I will not choose to ignore or react, I will respond to it instead. :)

Most people are sleep walkers, are you one of them?

Song Spinning Now: What a Wonderful World - Tony Bennett & KD Lang


"Just as the natural physical state of your body is health and vitality, your natural emotional state is peace and happiness. Whenever you experience a deviation from peace and happiness, it’s an indication that something is amiss. Something is wrong with what you’re thinking, doing or saying. Your feeling of inner happiness is the best indicator you could ever have to tell you what you should be doing more of and what you should be doing less of.

Unhappiness is to your life as pain is to your body. It is sent as a messenger to tell you that what you’re doing is wrong for you.Very often, you’ll suffer from what has been called “divine discontent.” You’ll feel fidgety and uneasy for a reason or reasons that are unclear to you. You’ll be dissatisfied with the status quo. Sometimes, you’ll be unable to sleep. Sometimes, you’ll be angry or irritable. Very often, you’ll get upset with things that have nothing to do with the real issue. You’ll have a deep inner sense that something isn’t as it should be, and you’ll often feel like a fish on a hook, wriggling and squirming emotionally to get free."

The above paragraph is extracted from my previous post on 'Using your inner guidance system'. If this feeling rings a bell in you, I must congratulate you, for you are in the minority who truly understands that something is greater out there.

I know exactly the kind of fidgety, uneasiness and restlessness feelings that Brian Tracy is talking about. Its hard to describe what it was and its even harder trying to pinpoint what exactly I am unhappy or dissatisfied about because I really had no idea what it was.

Once 'it' happened, there's no turning back because it kept burning at the back of your mind so much that you can't live in peace with yourself if you don't seek what is was and try to find an answer for that. In my opinion, I say this is a 'wake up call' to start changing my life for something bigger and better, although I wasn't quite sure how to do it. Brian was right about getting upset for unknown reasons indeed. Most importantly, there's an immense and innate need for me to attain a state of inner peace and happiness. I just had to find a way to attain them.

I believe everyone will have at least one major wake up call in life that teaches them to see a bigger picture and to be true to themselves, its really a matter of time. This happened at the beginning of 2004, after I left my advertising job followed by a silly accident that left me with a very bad broken arm where it took me nearly 8 months to fully recover. During my recovery period, I started to question about life, about the meaning of work, about my dreams, about my time here, about everything in fact. Its a strange bugging feeling; I can still remember this weird feeling as I was lying on the hospital bed, as if something was happening in me that is going to create a huge change.

'What is this all about..what are you trying to tell me?', 'So what now, what's next?' & 'What am I supposed to do now?' were the questions that infiltrated my confused mind. It sounded like a spiritual quest, but this feeling was totally new and foreign to me, it was so intense that I just can't ignore it, pretend nothing happen or forget about it. Sounds crazy I know, but I had to do something or I'll really go mental. Due to this hunger for information, I got started to devour lots of self-development books, stories, newsletters and seminars; something which I totally detest previously but had remained my passion ever since.

2004 was an exciting year of mind and soul discovery for my 'self'. I had also met lots of interesting and like-minded people. It was an enlightening, learning and enriching process that completely affected how I perceived the physical world and my inner world, which led to another 180 deg change in my personality.

For the first time in life, I truly tasted positivism, hope, tranquility, peace, compassion and empathy. There was a sense of liberation and it's such a wonderful state that you won't want to leave. Some people think I'm weird or different, and some even said that I'm too positive and confident, which is not a good thing. Well, I don't understand how mild negativism works but whatever it is, I know I'm given the gift of freewill and empowerment and if its up to be, its up to me.

I had my fair share of depression, negativism, bad karma, inner demons and I vowed to never never go back to my old state again. Even if I encountered negative energies, unpleasant situations or conversations now, it doesn't matter at all because I'm no longer affected and this kind of inner control is absolutely wonderful. This is what I call true freedom for I finally understood the saying 'The greatest enemy is yourself'.

I don't deny that this is a form of spiritual awareness, but this has nothing to do with any religion. However, I believe that there is a set of unified, core principles taught across all religions and personal development books. I call them the universal laws of life.

Anyway, this is why I can relate to the paragraph so perfectly. To sum it up, it is about acknowledging and recognising the inner discomfort and making a concious choice in seeking a way that is true and unique to you to alleviate the discomfort. It doesn't matter how you do it, as long as you are doing something about it. For me, I found my guidance and mentor in personal development. At times, I also find that I can learn lots from others, be it good or bad people, strangers or friends, family or colleagues. I totally agree with the saying 'When the student is ready, the teacher will appear'. So do not ignore this feeling because this can be the start to a life changing journey for your soul.

Inner Guidance to Inner Peace

Using Your Inner Guidance System ~ by Brian Tracy

How to access your inner powers to immediately determine what is right or wrong for you to do or not do.You have incredible powers of mind and emotions that give you timely and accurate feedback in every area of your life. In this article, you learn how to “tune in” to yourself so you can make the right decision in every situation.Using Your Inner Guidance SystemWe know that the body has a natural bias toward health and energy. It’s designed to last for 100 years with proper care and maintenance. When something goes wrong with any part of our body, we experience it in the form of pain or discomfort of some kind.

We know that when our body is not functioning smoothly and painlessly, something is wrong, and we take action to correct it. We go to a doctor; we take pills; we undergo physical therapy, massage or chiropractic. We know that if we ignore pain or discomfort for any period of time, it could lead to something more serious.

How To Tell Right From Wrong

In the same sense, nature also gives us a way to tell emotionally what’s right for us and what’s wrong for us in life. Just as nature gives us physical pain to guide us to doing or not doing things in the physical realm, nature gives us emotional pain to guide us toward doing or not doing things in the emotional or mental realm. The wonderful thing is that you’re constructed so that if you simply listen carefully to yourself—to your mind, your body and your emotions—and follow the guidance you’re given, you can dramatically enhance the quality of your life.

Just as the natural physical state of your body is health and vitality, your natural emotional state is peace and happiness. Whenever you experience a deviation from peace and happiness, it’s an indication that something is amiss. Something is wrong with what you’re thinking, doing or saying. Your feeling of inner happiness is the best indicator you could ever have to tell you what you should be doing more of and what you should be doing less of.

Unhappiness is to your life as pain is to your body. It is sent as a messenger to tell you that what you’re doing is wrong for you.Very often, you’ll suffer from what has been called “divine discontent.” You’ll feel fidgety and uneasy for a reason or reasons that are unclear to you. You’ll be dissatisfied with the status quo. Sometimes, you’ll be unable to sleep. Sometimes, you’ll be angry or irritable. Very often, you’ll get upset with things that have nothing to do with the real issue. You’ll have a deep inner sense that something isn’t as it should be, and you’ll often feel like a fish on a hook, wriggling and squirming emotionally to get free.

Divine Discontent

And that is a good thing. Divine discontent always comes before a positive life change. If you were perfectly satisfied, you would never take any action to improve or change your circumstances. Only when you’re dissatisfied for some reason do you have the inner motivation to engage in the outer behaviors that lead you onward and upward.Listen to yourself. Trust your inner voice. Go with the flow of your own personality. Do the things that make you feel happy inside and you’ll probably never make another mistake.


Action Exercises:

Now, here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, listen to yourself and trust your own feelings. If there is a part of your life that causes you stress and happiness, resolve to deal with it.

Second, identify those areas of your life where you are dissatisfied or frustrated for any reason. What changes should you, could you make?

Third, remember that nature wants you to be happy, healthy, popular and prosperous. Any deviation from those conditions is a signal to you that action is necessary.